Pet Peeves

A Pet Peeve is defined as the urban dictionary online as an unpleasant experience you cannot control, or a minor annoyance that an individual identifies as disturbing to themselves. While having coffee with my son this morning we started discussing a number of things we both find annoying when cruising, namely our pet peeves.

Personally speaking I find that all is good and valid when it comes to looking for sex online, but I took the time today to gather a list of the most recurrent and common ones so you can finally figure out why is it that you are not getting as lucky as you would like, or why some days it just takes so long. -in no particular order, just listing them as they come to mind-.

1. Take care of your overall appearance: in RL the most common pet peeves would be excessive body hair, smelly feet or bad breath, some people can't help it but in SL you really have no excuse, if you go out looking for sex like you just came out of Quasimodo's dungeon except the wait to be long and frustrating and most likely ending with you getting off on porn.

2. Know your audience: if you are into BDSM or have a particular fetish, cruise around SIMS with like-minded individuals, if your English is not very good, then go somewhere with people who can speak your language, any public or common cruising areas will simply mean arduous work and the equivalent of trying to find a needle in a haystack.

3. Play it cool: Flirting is fine, so is leading the chat into sex but anything too forward might scare your potential mr. right now away, don't offer sex right off the bat... most people hate it and it makes you look desperate.

4. No pictures: Don't ask for RL pictures or cock sizes or anything too specific unless you are sure the person is comfortable with it and it is listed on their profile. Most people are simply not willing to give out that sort of specific information and will most likely end the chat.

5. Work it: Use your charms, read the profile, figure out what buttons to push and what will the person most likely respond positively to -in short, put some muscle into it-, you can even introduce that knowledge into the intercourse, that will have the person asking for seconds. If you have an empty profile it means that you can't really be bothered and people will react likewise, so try to put at least some basic info in your profile.

6. Begging is for the homeless: Even if the person you are talking to is a friend or someone known for being easy, do not beg for sex, don't play the pity card or pull the heart strings to try and get yourself inside their pants, some people require a lot of work but the result is always mind blowing sex.

7. Chemistry, Chemistry, Chemistry: Most of the hottest sex you will have with people, will be the produce of your chemistry, how you two interact and respond to each other. Myself and many of my friends have even had sextext -this is sex by IM- with a person that was not even on the same SIM to begin with and I think of this fondly, namely because of the chemistry. If it's not happening don't force it, move on and find someone better.

8. An Orgasm is not the final frontier: Cumming is not a goal on itself and you will not get there if you make it your primary objective. Saying that you are a top when you are a bottom will be very obvious when it comes to the intercourse, the same applies to DOMS and SUBS, don't switch roles on the fly just to get off, trust me on this the other person WILL notice.

9. Santa had a list, you can too: Finding people again and again for sex can be time consuming and exhausting. If you manage to friend and keep a few around, even better, not only your circle of friends will be richer, but you will always have someone handy to discretely get off.

10. Don't kiss and tell: Going around bragging who you have slept with and what you did is tacky, keep it to yourself if you expect an encore.

Remember the golden rule, the orgasm is not your goal, the actual intercourse is. Sex should always be a pleasurable experience, being one of those cases where the thing that matters the most is the journey, not the destination -yes even the flirting-. And don't get offended if you fail to comply to any of the above and get made fun of by either the person you are trying to get to sleep with you or their friends, it comes with the territory.

https://www.facebook.com/spikecls

The Invisible sizes

The second life simulator is built upon the premise that you can be who you want, when you want and wherever you want, the imagination being your only limit, but there are times and places where -much like n real life- some sectors and communities in second life face discrimination from the same group of people that fight day to day to try and get equal rights.

In the wide array of lifestyles that make second life, there is a growing community of people who some people call "twinks" -One of my good friends Sora, in the picture with me being on this group-. They suffer segregation and as consequence are forced to have their own clubs, their own sims and their own cruising places, just because someone way back decided that the height cannon for avatars in second life for adults should range around 7 to 8 feet.

So when someone decides to create the person they want to be in second life, and choose to stick to realistic real life height measures -this being from 5.7 to 6 feet tall-, they are instantly called "kids", accused of age play and asked to leave adult sims only accessible if you are age verified -Spurts and Hubs to name a few-, but where is the fine line between age play and someone just wanting to look "normal" according to human standards and simply refuse to lose their identity just because someone way back decided that 7 feet tall was the acceptable adult size for avatars?

When the person that is Spike in second life was born, I was assisted on height standards and shops to go to for the specific look I was going for, so being this tall is all I know, but sometime today I decided to experience what it felt like to be 6 feet tall in second life and what the reaction of people around me in popular gay places I frequent would be. We were both ignored, point blank; no one talked to us, approached us or even tried to discourage us from being around -this being mostly because management staff was not around, but that being the case I am sure we would have been asked to leave, as it has happened before-. I walked by a couple of "friends" at one of the sims and they simply pretended I was not even there.

I guess to be visible and respected in all sims, hence avoiding segregation, one must comply to certain height standards; a sad reality considering the LGTB community in RL and SL are the ones fighting day after day evils such as segregation, discrimination and other types of evils that are only fueled by ignorance and fear. So the gay community in SL that of the "tall people", is inflicting this very thing on a growing community of people.

I chose who I wanted to be, so did they; I'll wake up every morning and go to bed every night knowing I have done right by people, hence being an example to my two sons and my community, never falling on double standards that only work on my end. All sorts of people are always welcome to my club and sim, either if you are a twink, a furry, a neko, a fairy or just someone who thinks ugly is actually pretty, as long as you follow TOS and conduct yourself in a respectful manner while having fun.

https://www.facebook.com/spikecls